Life is crap …at least for some people

I met a couple of interesting people lately, through observing them, I learned some important lessons. I will not use their real name, I’m calling them Gareth and Judith.

Gareth told me that he is pretty much fearless, he also laments that he is unhappy because of the absence of a romantic interest in his life. He said that he tried to “pick up” women in bars but he didn’t work for him. I suggested that he would have more chance if he could approach some girls in bus, train, park or library or some stores.
He said he can’t approach in bus because he doesn’t feel safe. But, how comes he is fearless and he can’t approach a girl, there is a quite bit of denial with him, you can’t chant being fearless, if you are afraid to approach a stranger. Now, Gareth sees his “shiness” as a part of himself, he can’t think of him without it, this explains the cause of the denial because ,he has developed his own idea of being fearless and it is based on what he is himself, he can’t think beyond that.
People cannot be grander than their thoughts.

Judith told me that she is a child abuse survivor, she constantly uses her past as an excuse for the life, she has now, I told her, that to change her life , she has to change her thoughts but she answered that she cannot change her thoughts because she has been abused in the past. I tried to explain to her that she has a messy life because she is focused on creating one, she replied that she knows then I asked her, why she doesn’t stop it ? Then she answered that she has been abused in the past.

I gave her baby first step exercise to help her change, I told her to write on paper, what she wants for her life, I said that I couldn’t continue the discussion if she doesn’t do the exercise I can’t spend time with someone contented with the status quo. She said she can’t do the exercise because she has been abused in the past and she said the help of a professional psychotherapist could be better, I agreed. I haven’t heard from her since.

I gave her baby first step exercise to help her change, I told her to write on paper, what she wants for her life, I said that I couldn’t continue the discussion if she doesn’t do the exercise I cant spend time with someone contented with the status quo. She said she can’t do the exercise because she has been abused in the past, she needs the help of a professional psychotherapist, I agreed. I haven’t heard of her since with was 4 days ago.
Both Judith and Gareth can’t go beyond their comfort zone, they see themselves one way and it seems that it is impossible for them to project any further. The frustration they feel, the unhappiness and the search for a form of solution, is their “true” self trying to encourage change where the personality is content with the status quo, the difference between the “true” self and the personality causes the frustration, one part of the being want to evolve when another part want to remain the same.
In this case the personality wants to remain the same, the personality sees change as a death and it doesn’t want to die. However, it is important for such people to understand that the personality is part of the “true” self, and they are their true self. There is a no real separation. During the dream time the “true” self will assemble a play that will be acted out during waking hours, the play often contains signals, symbols and information for the personality to follow toward change, that’s why it is important to be an observer, the true self doesn’t judge the personality and the true self will help you to get what you want. If you want a better life, the true self will work to give you clues to follow , symbols to understand so you could take a step toward a better life.
Because, people are usually unfocused they do not pay any attention to the signs their “true” self is trying to communicate. I use the term “true” self because when we are asleep we are a lot more aware and true to ourselves than when we are awake.
Initially, it was easy to communicate to act more as the ”true” self and being with purposes, however, over the ages we have layered ourselves so much to the point to completely forgot about the true self. Its existence is denied only the waking hours of the personality are valued, thus people can’t answer questions such as : Who I’am ? and What I’m here for ?

Now, I said the personality but an individual has more than one personality but it is usually also denied. If your current personality isn’t good at speaking publicly you could switch to a personality of your that is good at that. But, usually people do not do that consciously as they fear to lose themselves. In fact, fear is so ubiquitous in people life that we tend to fear ourselves, therefore, often people like Judith and Gareth lock themselves in one dominant personality and rarely experience or very seldom experiences their other personalities. They could either spend their lifetime like this or in some cases when the frustration is too big and the need for change strong enough, they might create a life crisis. A life crisis usually forces someone that doesn’t want to change to move ahead. The framework of a life crisis is chosen because the personality has ignored all the “friendly” signs therefore a crisis is one of the few options left. Usually the nature of life crisis is an expression of the issues at play. A car crashing into a tree and being sent in a hospital where the room companion is a guy who tell his story about his NDE (Near Death Experience) and his re-focus on more meaningful matters could be a strong symbol for an individual about the next direction to take and the current direction to give up in life.
Now, to go back to that Judith, I showed her my blog and videos , she didn’t understand, it is all hogwash… from her standpoint and I can’t help her, so basically, I serve no purpose in her life or may be she didn’t know what did I serve in her life. I do know why I did meet her, but from her standpoint, I’m just another sign she ignored.
There is my side in that story with Judith, I will talk about it in a next issue of my newsletter. This is a little different matter and I assume that newsletter readers are there already or interested to be there. You with this post have at least some more food for thoughts about creating and manifesting reality.

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