The Unconscious death urge

You may wonder, but I think I already felt this urge quite conscious.
It was an enjoyable feeling, like the outlook on something pleasurable to
happen in the future.

This sometimes comes up, when I feel overwhelmed by life, and its experiences.

But when I feel this urge, it makes me calm and gives me hope.

I recognize: “You´re not forever”

(< - this also is the vocal of a DnB record I like to listen, when I feel that
way)

[the above statement means being not forever on the physical plane]

look forward to the last adventure, besides meditation.

be well…

Yeah, I had those moments of lucidity, that why I wrote the post in first place:)

Am I understanding this concept? Is this when a person has a death-wish? I am going through a bad patch at the moment, and – although I don’t want to commit suicide AT ALL – I wish I could just lie down on my bed and die.

This is a different concept, below is an article by Leonar Orr on the subject.

The Death Urge
by Young Leonard

The death urge is a psychic entity that usually overcomes the rational mind and splits the body off from the Eternal spirit and destroys it. The physical body without the eternal aliveness of Life Itself becomes stiffer – more solid – until the Spirit drops it to become dust. The Bible calls the rational mind the great adulterer which seduces us away from the Spirit which is ultimate reality beyond the mind and the Source of the mind. The mind can go 100 miles per hour, but the body can not until it becomes a light body. The subtle currents of physical death urge elude the mind in its pursuit of worldly success or divine service (which is just another form of worldly success) until it is too late to change the habits we are in bondage to. The basic habits that kill most people are too obvious to mention: food, money, sleep, family, home, business, car, etc. Most people, of course, choose physical death as a result of popular religious conditioning. Popular, orthodox religion is the institutionalized adulterer. By definition, organized religion can never embody the Eternal Life of the Eternal Spirit, even though it outlives the individual. To make religion orthodox is to kill it. People who trust organization more than their own Eternal Spirit are doomed to be on the birth-death cycle until they learn to live in the reality above the mind. The unconscious death urge is caused by two basic sources. One is the belief system that death is inevitable and beyond our control. This belief is taught by parents to children generation after generation along with numerous corollaries of self sabotaging thoughts that sabotage our natural divinity. The other is what I call emotional energy pollution. Excess mind energy is always spinning in our aura and the auras of every other person. When we are in the presence of another person we collect some of this mind stuff like psychic dirt. If we don’t get rid of it by bathing twice per day and other spiritual purification practices, we become miserable and feel like dying after a while. We collect emotional energy in our guts – the solar plexus first which is the social chakra, then it spreads throughout our whole energy body and makes us feel heavy. It produces the guru belly phenomena and other physical problems. Immersing our solar plexus in water – soaking in the bath or even showers – and sitting with an open fire cleans our aura. Fire literally burns away the death urge we collect from other people. Emotional energy contains information that can give us diseases and make us feel like dying. The pure presence of one person can also heal another. The only way you can conquer the death urge is to outlive it. We can only outlive it by developing the habits of aliveness: mantra yoga, earth, air, water, fire purification and spiritual community. Earth is fasting and exercise; air is breathing energy as well as air; water is bathing; fire is learning to live with an open flame; and spiritual community means to have a guru – spiritual teacher – or at least a friend on the path to enlightenment. A body in motion tends to stay in motion until acted upon by an outside force. We are the victims of our habits. Other people are the outside force. We can look for the guru in every other person and thing, but there is no substitute for an enlightened friend who can accelerate our transformation from mortal to immortal consciousness that includes our physical body. Babaji – the Eternal Father in human form, the Angel of the Lord in the Bible, or Shiva Yogi – the Eternal Youth, perfected my knowledge of eternal life in 1980 when he finished editing my Physical Immortality book. Since then, He has expanded my understanding and mastery of the principles on a daily basis, which I am glad to share with people who are interested. Obviously, suicide and homicide is another manifestation of the death urge. Auto accidents are a disguised form of suicide and homicide. Physical immortality philosophy provides a context and support to unravel the death urge. The death urge contains the ugliest of human emotions. It is a psychic entity we are better off without. As long as we are mind and the Eternal Spirit, we will always have the power to leave or to destroy the body, or to transfigure and ascend with our physical body. Who needs an unconscious death urge anyway? Spiritual purification exercises are the fast and easy way to total victory. Babaji says,
The wise do spiritual practices